Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
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