Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
Randomize
