Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize