She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
He passed out mid-signature
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
I think a kid would responsible me up
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Randomize
