The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
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