Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Randomize