too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
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I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
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I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
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