it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
So I answered the door in my underwear expecting my boyfriend. Instead I opened the door to Mormon missionaries. Do you think that was a sign from God?
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
