All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Randomize