if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
I'm having to shit out rocks
Randomize