Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
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