If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
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