FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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