so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
Randomize
