i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Randomize
