i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
Randomize
