Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
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