and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
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