Me. At least after what I've been through.
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
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