the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
I think a kid would responsible me up
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
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