I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
What happened to fro yo and sex?
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Randomize
