Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Randomize
