he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
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