Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
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The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
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Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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