who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
Got wasted in a little tiki hut by the beach yesterday. Woke up with a coconut and half of a mushroom burger in my purse. I also have a picture of our Romanian bartender's fingernails on my phone lol
Why do you always wake up with meat in your purse?
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
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