Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize
