I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
