sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
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