it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Randomize
