i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
