I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize