her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
Randomize
