I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
Randomize