who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
i just realized that the oil change sticker on my windshield is a day before the last time i had sex. I've driven exactly 10500 miles since.
you need to get laid.. and an oil change.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
Randomize
