I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
