I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
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Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
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