so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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