Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
Randomize