i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize
