I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Randomize