had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
Randomize
