This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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