Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Randomize