so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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