I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
Randomize
