I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Randomize
