A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize