Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize
