Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
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