I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
The iPhone is ruining my ability to sex message. My 5-year-old cousin just picked up my phone at my grandmas birthday party and read "I wanna stand you up and fuck you from behind" to my entire extended family bc of popped up on my screen
It's like God shit irony all over that family
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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