It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
Randomize
